“Falling in Love” Versus “Rising In Love”

By Dr. Robert V. Gerard

(as of 15 June 2005)

There exists a major difference between
the notion of “falling” and “rising” in love.
She “falls” in love with him.  He “falls” in
love with her. This human constraint has
virtually stymied mankind from civilization
to civilization. Let’s explore how “Rising in
Love” can better serve you.

You can subconsciously become
dis-empowered when “falling” in love.
This occurs when your expectations or
desires you have for another become
subjective within the relationship. You
virtually begin giving up your inner
relationship with Self. You begin to
forget what makes you unique and
centered. I parallel this as falling from
grace. When this occurs, you have
the task of rekindling the spirit of
true self-love. You do this in order to
regain personal balance of your
perception of your unique Self.

     “Falling” in love carries an accepted
notion influenced by our society, movies,
music, and soap operas. The term
“Falling in Love” is traditionally welcomed.
It is more of letting go of your concentration
of self into the potential expectation of what
and how it affects another. There’s absolutely
nothing wrong with the process. It works to
cause experiences that will eventually guide
you to listen to your heart’s intelligence.


True love is heart-driven. Relationships
affect the heart and are the instruments
that generate experiences to make that
happen.

“Rising” in love brings on the notion
that you never surrender self-empowerment
for another. You stay steadfastly centered
in love with one’s Self and keep the highest
integrity with your Soul. You remain
centered in Self while creatively sharing
and merging with the energies of another.
Beauty in Self, and in the Self of another,
are never lost or jeopardized.

These philosophical differences
primarily distinguish the character on
how you position yourself in social
consciousness. When you “fall” in love,
it is analogous to pouring your energies
into the embodiment of another.


When you “rise” in love, you accelerate
moving your energies into higher creative
realms. There always exists the opportunity
to integrate love objectively. Attachment
and dependency are not demonstrated, and
you maintain the awareness of Self.

With “Rising” in love, emotional
balance must be maintained in order for
the energies to properly integrate. If any
conflicts arise between you and your
partner, a signal of imbalance is
communicated. Thus the partnership
need soon reconcile, otherwise, the
system of integration becomes defused.


Each partner immediately generates
the wisdom and affection to prevent
further disintegration onto their loving
relationship.

Partners in a “falling in love"
relationship can innocently become
co-dependent on each other’s energies.
As this dependency silently grows,
decisions, expectations, and
communication become co-dependent
as well. Partners in this case generate
tremendous reciprocal energy patterns
of conflict and confusion. The energies
between the two partners become
stressful as their individualities erode.


       The “falling-in” lovers are out of
synchronicity. Energy is chaotic,
inconsistent, and in turmoil. Pain and
grief are usually the compromise,
followed, of course, by depression.

Freedom has its merits. Freedom
in a relationship is not so much in
mobility as it is in free expression.
When one enjoys a stream of
consciousness reflecting peaceful
existence, then inner peace empowers
personal freedom. If you “fall in love",
you ignite a level of consciousness
that endows obligation, i.e., immobility.


       If you “rise in love", you virtually
stimulate a mobility through your
creative process, inadvertently
demanding more freedom.  In this
state of consciousness, your cognition
and emotional complement are
enhanced as life is more fulfilling.

At the moment of “Falling in
Love,” one can actually feel his or
her heart pouring out. It trembles
with excitement as it abandons
the most sacred place of its
existence—its heart center. For some,
the excitement sensed may very well
be the fear of potential abandonment
or rejection.

When capturing the moment of
“rising” in love, you can sense a force
field of love.  It is grounded in your
heart center, moves upward through
you, and outward towards what you
love. There’s never a separation
between what you love and who you are.


It always remains in a state of oneness.
Being in a higher state of consciousness
increases your energy flow substantially.

There’s no turning back on LOVE,
from a Spiritual point of view. Love IS.
It can be shared and merged, as well as
discouraged, but will always remain as
an ascending energy flow. It is a form
of creative energy that resides outside
the boundaries of mind and free will.

      Free Will affords you the opportunity
to choose how to make love, whether
falling or rising. Humans have the choice
to empower or dis-empower the process
of “making love.” The God-given right
of Free Will provides the mechanisms
of creativity to perform tasks positively
or negatively. This is a fundamental
principle of duality. It provides the events
and experiences for you to discern.
Proper use of free will enables you to
remain centered, in oneness, with your
body and Spirit.

Making Love, in a pure sense,
serves as one of the highest acts of
the human creative process. Making
Love is a pure and noble act that brings
forth a state of Grace and Peace.
Manifesting this kind of love-making
brings a sense of royalty with Spirit
within the partnership.

When two partners experience
heightened passion, a sense of awe
and bliss appear. Though short-lasting,
it elicits a state of divination or inner
peace.  The duration of this sensation
will increase providing both partners
diligently generate higher standards
of intimacy and co-existence.

 The solidarity of a partnership
demands that each partner remain
centered and cognitive of one’s intents
and actions for his or her own Highest
Good. Each will witness how Universal
Forces of Love systematically
provide a constant supply of heart-driven
energy and wellness into the partnership.

When partners begin to “fall” out of
love, feelings of distress, abandonment,
even rejection set in. On the surface,
these feelings are construed as a loss of
energy. In reality, this is a misnomer,
because the creative forces of Love
cannot be identified and assumed
nonexistent. Thus the Universal Forces
of Love remain suppressed and unused.
This suppression of energy builds
relentlessly into a reservoir called:
anxiety. Once rationale and logical mind
begins to generate mental chatter,
heart-driven intelligence becomes dormant.
The emotional heart withdraws to a
lifeless state and becomes brittle and
dysfunctional. Eventually, it descends
to a broken heart.

“Falling” in love is an acceptable
phrase as society and institutional
laws protect that paradigm. Lawyers
and counselors rationalize the process
for you. Capitalism thrives on this
paradigm. Society plays havoc on the
scenarios of heartbroken people.


From soap operas to heart-wrenching
love stories, best-sellers and tear-jerkers,
conflict is captivating and addictive.
Duality thrives on opposing energies.
Blood runs hot and our emotions flare
in agony, but we humans must prevail,
so there must be something good about
“Falling in Love.”

***

The notions of “Soul Mate,” "Soul
Partner,” and “Twin Flame” are pop-art
phrases of the century. What do they mean?
How do you know the essential qualities
of your Soul?  What happens when in a
relationship with another Soul? What
experiences are initiated to foster your
inner growth?

When we talk about “Soul Mates”
we infer that there are at least two Souls
playing around in some karmic game of
give and take. Soul Mates are companions
or buddies who come and go, stay for a
while and leave. What this means is that
most everyone you meet or know serves
as a mirror of yourself. The notion: the
“Universe is a Mirror,” infers that what
you perceive in others holds some kind
of message for you to discern. This could
take place in any person, place, thing, or
event. A cat can be your soul mate.

Stepping up a notch, “Soul Partners”
could mean marriage or not, but some
form of consistent communication and
co-existence. It’s when people are on
Earth at the same time to help their
soul partner reflect upon an aspect of
consciousness that may need
improvement or repair. Soul Partners
are the mechanics, so to speak, who
will help you fix this or that.

The notion of “Flame” means fire
and fire means purification. So when we
speak of “Twin Flame” don’t necessarily
think it means a relationship enjoying
a higher standard of love or bliss, as
most people understand it to mean.
Rather, think of “Twin Flame” as that
person who has the greatest commitment,
whether consciously or unconsciously,
to do what it takes to help purify you.
A difficult divorce may be the medicine
you need to wake up.

This purification, indeed, can be
hot, as some of us know quite well.
Twin Flames tend to burn things up
sooner or later. On the positive note,
two candles can better light up a dark
room.

Love is energy; it’s an intense
vibrational field, which can be felt.
Yes, you can identify whether you’re
falling or rising in love. Your perception
of that vibrational field is crucial.

How do you know which love
vibrational field you are manifesting?
When you are with your child or pet,
you know you are not “falling” in love.
You can, however, feel yourself “rise”
in creative love for them. It’s unconditional!

Look at your spouse, mate, or
friend and perceive: Do you have
expectations for your love with them?
Do you desire that they accept you
and your love? If so, then you place the
requirement of conditional love, which
is an expectation. In this case, you’re
dis-empowering true love for yourself
and towards another.

On the other hand, when you offer
love unconditionally without any
desired outcome, you feel love flow
through you, then you are in “Rising Love.”

Either “Falling” or “Rising” love
works. Most of the time, people are
“falling in love,” relentlessly seeking
their ideal “Twin Flame”—their perfect
partner—the One!

Every one sends out signals of
attraction. Whales and porpoises
can send out their mating signals or
calls well over 5,000 miles. Humans
are no exception, we send out signals
of attraction continuously. That’s why
we keep getting the same people in our
lives. If you desire to attract different
people or that special mate, you need
to change your signal.

Your signal mirrors who you are
to others. If you are afraid of the opposite
sex, you’ll attract someone who is also
afraid of the opposite sex. That
relationship will not go too far. When
you are at peace with yourself, you
will attract another who is at peace
with himself or herself. When that occurs,
you will both immerse in a special
vibrational communication. From this
point on, you will know and feel what
“Rising” in love is all about.

Attracting a mate who knows you
instantly and loves you for who you
are is a most beautiful event. In most
cases, you will soon repeat these
words to each other: “I’ve always loved you.”

Maintaining respectful communication
and being intrigued with each other
generates excitement, romance, and
the passion for more “rising in love
consciousness.” This is why it’s
imperative to understand that life
exists in the moment, constantly renews
itself in the moment, and spawns new
avenues of creation in the moment.


Rarely can it be said that couples who
live in “rising in love consciousness”
ever return to boredom.

       Let’s go beyond the notion of the
“Twin Flame.” Once your heart is wide
open, emotionally pure, confident, and
self-loving, your signal of attraction can
only be heard by that special person,
your “Shining Light.”

Your “Shining Light” will be beautiful.
I know this well. You can feel it. This
Rising in Love Consciousness is
instantaneous. Your Divine Plan enacted,
you are ready to receive this beautiful person.

What will you do to rise in love
and honor your inner beauty? I’d love to
know your insight. Have a romantic day.

In 1994, Dr. Gerard started Oughten
House Foundation, Inc., a worldwide
educational and publishing company
concentrating on self-empowerment
and other inspirational topics. He
lives and sustains a private counseling
practice in Port Washington, New York,
beautifully located near Long Island
Sound. He lectures and offers workshops
worldwide. Dr. Gerard has written seven
books: Handling Verbal Confrontation,
The Corporate Mule, DNA Healing
Techniques, Change Your DNA,
Change Your Life!, Lady from Atlantis,
Give Hope a Chance, ICON THERAPY:
Quick-Fix Techniques for Resolving Issues,
and has published dozens of articles.
Dr. Gerard can be reached at (1-800)
503-8873 or E-mail:
DrGerard33DNA@aol.com

Copyright©2001 Dr. Robert V. Gerard

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