Guidelines for Enlightenment to Brighten Your Day

 by Swami Beyondananda - Famous Author of the Book MY KARMA RAN OVER MY
DOGMA

 1. Be a Fundamentalist--make sure the Fun always comes before the
mental.  Realize that life is a situation comedy that will never be
canceled.  A laugh track has been provided, and the reason  why we are put
in the material world is to get more material. Have a good laugh at least
twice a day, and that will ensure regular hilarity.

2. Remember that each of us has been given a special gift, just for
entering - so you are already a winner!

3. The most powerful tool on the planet today is Tell-A-Vision. That is
where I tell a vision to you,  and you tell a vision to me. That way, if
we don't  like the programming we're getting, we can simply change the
channel.

4. Life is like photography. You use the negative to develop.

5. It is true. As we go through life thinking  heavy thoughts, thought
particles tend to get caught between the ears, causing a condition  called
truth decay. So be sure to use mental floss twice a day. And when you're
tempted to  practice tantrum yoga, remember what we teach in Swami's
Absurdiveness Training class: *Don't get  even, get odd.*

6. If we want world peace, we must let go of our  attachments and truly
live like nomads. That's  where I no mad at you, you no mad at me. That
way, there'll surely be no madness on the planet.  And peace begins with
each of us. A little peace here, a little peace there, pretty soon all the
peaces will fit together to make one big peace everywhere.  YES!

7. I know great earth changes have been predicted for the future, so if
you're looking to avoid earthquakes, my advice is simple. When you  find a
fault, just don't dwell on it.

8. There's no need to change the world. All we  have to do is toilet
train the world, and we'll never have to change it again.

9. If you're looking to find the key to the  Universe, I have some bad
news and some good  news. The bad news is: there is no key to the
Universe. The good news is: it has been left  unlocked.

10. Finally, everything I have told you is channeled. That way, if you
don't like it, it's not my fault.  And remember, enlightenment is not a
bureaucracy. So we don't have to go through channels.

11. There are two kinds of mystics in the world, the optimystics and
the pessimystics.  Although pessimystics seem to be more in touch with
"reality," optimystics are happier and live longer.

12. It's the pessimystics who've been crying, "The sky is falling, the
sky is falling!" The optimystics simply smile and say, "No. It only looks
that way because we are ascending."

13.  Of course, for those people who read the news -- not to mention
those unfortunate enough to be in the news -- this has not been an easy
year to offer an optimystic reframe to loads of pessimystic evidence.

14  There's an old saying, "It always seems darkest before it gets
really dark," but we optimystics don't buy  it. Call me a hopeless
"hopium" addict, but I say it can't hurt to look on the bright side.

15.  Sure, you can say we human beings have moved further down the path
of self-destruction ... or you could say the earth is ridding itself of
its most virulent parasite. You can deplore the increased war, disease and
starvation, or you can go, "Hey, population control without birth control
or abortion!" You can worry over America's turn toward
totalitarianism or you can say, "Ah, simplicity! We've boiled the Bill of
Rights down to just one: You have the right to remain silent."

16. Seriously, we do have a choice. One of my favorite stories recently
is about a Native American  grandfather talking to his young grandson. He
tells the boy he has two wolves inside of him struggling with each other.
The first is the wolf of peace, love and kindness. The other wolf is fear,
greed and hatred. "Which wolf will win, grandfather?" asks the young boy.
"Whichever one I feed," is the reply. Every day -- every moment -- we have
the choice to feed the wolf of love or the wolf of fear.

17. If war is a necessary evil, that makes it all the more important to
express peace as a necessary good. Whatever  love, kindness, laughter, or
generosity we create in our immediate vicinity radiates outward like a
"perfect Ponzi scheme" where everyone wins and nobody loses.


 ---- A simple thought on Truth. If you can start the day without caffeine, if you can get along without pep pills,if you can always be cheerful, ignoring aches and pains, If you can get excited and cheerful when seeing you loved ones after a small absence, as if it were the very first time you set eyes upon them in ages, If your love for man does not erode with habit and time but always remains steadfastly the same, no matter how little or bad attention you are getting, If you can accept verbal and physical abuse without automatic resentment, desire for revenge, and the need to show your inborn physical power and ability to inflict harm. If you do not need to be proven "right" and others "wrong."if you can resist complaining and boring people with your troubles, if you can eat the same food every day and be grateful for it, if you can understand when your loved ones are too busy to give you anytime, if you can overlook it when those you loved take it out on you when, through no fault of yours, something goes wrong, If you can take criticism and blame without resentment, if you can ignore a friend's limited education and never correct him, if you can resist treating a rich friend better than a poor friend, If you cannot stand fear-thoughts addressed at you by  others, and only relate to love, If you only read the intention and heart of man and not his external appearance, if you can face the world without lies and deceit, always expressing your true feelings, If you can always jump and get excited at the fragrance, beauty and eternal energy bestowed by the natural world, If you would even forgo your life away without a moment of doubt in the name of Love, If you realize that you are here to protect and guard the integrity and security of all your extended family, If you accept death and dying as anatural cycle of Eternity, if you can conquer tension without medical help, if you can relax without liquor, if you can sleep without the aid of drugs,if you can honestly  say that deep in your heart you have no prejudice against creed, color, religion or politics, Then my dear friends you will have approached the level of spiritual development of your dog. i.e. Why G.o.d. made a mirror image as D.o.g. to show us and express holographically in simple terms, as our best friend, what  unconditional Love IS and should be. Or why Adam's civilization should not continue making a mirror reversed image of Himself as A-mad world.  The Dog is wonderful, really in service, and Godly. It is a manifestation of the Unmanifest in Manifested Creation.  He protects you like a God. And as such, he cannot make decisions and domuch things for you, for you have to act, decide and do things for him, since you are the active part.  You feed him because The Manifest (Man) feeds the Unmanifest(Godliness).  At the same time he loves you up to death, in the same way as the Unmanifest loves you unconditionally regardless of what you do including hurting Him.  And all he is asking from you,  as a favor, is just to feed him with your actions and show him love and the simple recognition that he exists, and begs of  you to give him an interesting and happy life, in the same way as the Godliness only asks of us to give Him loving recognition, and avariety of  joyful and loving life experiences.